Well tomorrow i will be 32 weeks pregnant and i am so grateful to feel so great still. Unfortunately we have had some complications but according to the doctor we are okay and most likely will still have a full term baby boy. I had some preterm contractions in early February and ended up in triage and after a few hours they gave me a shot of turbutaline and the contractions went away. We noted my file and doctor said most likely that was a fluke and no big deal. Then on Tuesday afternoon i started getting a few braxton-hicks copntractions and they started getting more frequent as the night went on, finally by 8 pm i realized they were getting conssitently closer together and not going away. So the doctor sent me back to triage and we went through the process again. This time they gave me another shot of turbutaline and a pill of something that is a smooth muscle relaxer. The contractions did not completely go away but did lessen greatly afterwards so i got sent home in the middle of the night. My doctor wanted to see me the next morning since i was still having contractions very close to menstrual cramps and wasn't comfortable. We checked for signs of cervical change(preterm labor) and luckily everything looked very good so he gave me a prescription for the turbutaline pills to keep the contractions at a minimum and hopefully go away completely. It took a few days on bedrest but finally late friday night they went away and for the past three days i have stayed on bedrest without any contractions. The doctor said once they went away i could start back to normal activity but according to my family normal activity for me is go, go, go which is a no, no, no!
I am grateful that it is only preterm contractions and not preterm labor as it seems to be controlable at the moment with medicine and rest. Also since we are this far along our baby is most likely around the 4 lb mark or bigger which means if the contractions sent me into preterm labor at least the baby would have less complications than if born much earlier. The doctor says we are just working towards 35-36 weeks and that is a huge milestone where if born baby Evan would most likley have a short hopsital stay or maybe even get to take him home right away. Hard to believe that we could possibly have a baby coming home in as little as 3 weeks...yikes!
I have almost all the necessities to bring a new baby home but i am no where mentaly ready for this little one. I keep asking myself what i was thinking wanting a third child why did i feel such a life shattering need to have another child....the past few restaurant and shopping experiences have been pure disasters with them acting like total maniacs but then my son brings me a flower from the yard and a huge kiss and it reminds me exaclty why. I am excited to see how our family dynamics change and what this little boy will do to mix things up. I am wondering if he will look like Grant or completely different. Will he breastfeed for a year like Hailey or will he be a formula baby like Grant? Will he be a content baby or end up with colic? I am looking forward to seeing how we function and cope with being a new family of 5!.
I am having a hard time coping with the fact that our family is now complete. Not sure i totally believe it, even though i know three kids is more than enough for me to handle. I still don't feel in my heart that we are done or our family is complete. I will leave that final decision up to my husband. He was content with two children and i never thought i would convince him we needed a third but somehow he decided it would be so. Now the decision will be up to him again. If he decided this is it-I will be happy with my princess and my two princes, more than happy, overly elated but i have always wanted a house full of girls. I feel a pull for a daughter. Not sure what route i want to try and go to make that possible. Not sure i want to try another pregnancy, change it up and try foster parenting or adoption but i want to leave our options opened for the future, just in case my husband opens his heart to the idea of another child, hopefully a duaghter! ;)
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